Before and After Love
by Enchanted Pink Jade
Summary: Exactly what the title says. A short and sweet fic in Sana's POV. She thinks about life back then and now, about the love that she found in between... Her thoughts are interrupted when Akito comes by to pick her up for their date. ^_^ S+A!!! *One-Shot*


This is just a short story I wrote in Sana's POV. Hope you enjoy!   
  
Disclaimer: I don't own these characters...   
  
**Before and After Love**   
By: Enchanted Pink Jade   
*~*~*~*~*   
  
Kurata Sana   
6th Grade   
April 2, 1994   


  
**When Acting Hurts**   
_I'm the greatest actress ever_   
_And the world is my stage_   
_I work 24 hours non-stop_   
_Day and night, despite my age._   
_I use emotions like I would a mask_   
_Concealing what I truly feel_   
_I laugh and smile with everyone else_   
_While wishing that the happiness was real._   
_There may be intermissions_   
_Five minutes between each scene_   
_I use that time to change my role_   
_Like from a peasant to a queen._   
_I have my lines well memorized_   
_Each word committed to mind_   
_No one can tell the difference_   
_My acting's so good, I've got them all blind_   
_The crowds, they roar to see my face_   
_They all love me to the bone_   
_But if that's true, and I'm loved by many_   
_Why do I still feel so alone?_   
_I'm better than the rest_   
_No one can compare to me_   
_I'll have the whole world fooled_   
_Just you wait and see._

  
  
  
I laid down the worn out piece of paper, on which I had written this depressing poem for a school assignment, years back. After re-reading it a couple of times, I realized that it almost didn't sound like me, not the me of who I am today. And the last couple of lines reeked of conceitedness. Yet, what did all that matter when it still got the message across?   
Acting isn't all it's cracked up to be.   
Some people think that all it takes to be a good actress (or actor) is a person with some talent and straight, white teeth. But nowadays, even that could be fixed. This actress begs to differ. At the age of 15, I've been in the drama business for quite some time now, and I know what it's really like.   
I didn't belong to myself any longer, but to the fans, to the managers, to the directors, to the script writers... What my feelings meant to others was nothing, as long as I can satisfy everyone else, before myself. Of course, there were times when I had fun. But those bouts of happiness never lasted. So my last movie made the top of the charts. So what? What does that say about me? That it was a job well done?   
Yes. It was a job well done, because that's what expected of me. I'm supposed to be the best, even when I'm not as good as everyone thinks I am. At least, that's what I think. I'm required to be a good actress, a good friend (which of course I am), a good student- sometimes I wish I could just be bad at something. But no. That's not allowed for me. About the only person who's never expected anything of me is Hayama Akito.   
The mere thought of him brought a scowl to my face. It isn't fair, how he plays. The way he looks at me, it's as if he can see right through me, to my very core. To my heart. My training from the Komawari Theater is whittled to nothing when he's the one I'm facing, and the façade comes tumbling down.   
He was the kind of guy whom many resented at one point, many including me. Not surprising, really, when he was the one who encouraged so much chaos in class, and whatever else he did that wasn't on school grounds.   
And yet...   
I befriended him. My sworn enemy- and from then on, things changed. Like the fact that I hated him. That hate I once felt turned to tolerance. From tolerance to warmth- the kind that you would feel for a close friend, someone of kinship. And from warmth to love.   
I smiled softly as I thought of days during those times. There were no fireworks, no alarming bells sounding in my head, no stars dancing in front of my eyes, and no angels singing a heavenly song. It just happened without me realizing. And it was that naiveté that caused some trouble for the both of us. All that was settled, but not without some pain of course, for there were more people involved in this. Our friends. At least everything turned out for the best. If nothing was resolved, then we wouldn't have been dating for... 2 years it seems.   
_*knock*knock*_   
Speaking of dating- here's my date right now. I sighed and returned my poem in its respectful place. (Inside one of my old journals). Then I walk to my balcony window- Yes. My balcony window, to let my date in.   
I rolled my eyes with exasperation as he stepped through. "Akito, why can't you ever use the front door, like any other person would?"   
"Because I'm not any other person. Come on, are you ready?" Yup, this is my guy. no flowers, and no proper greeting. Just straight and to the point.   
"Yeah, just let me tell my mom and Rei that I'll be going." I grabbed a light sweater and headed for my door, but before I could get there, it opened, and my mom's head popped in.   
"Sana? Did I hear... Oh never mind," she said, upon seeing Akito standing behind me. "Well, have fun!" she said, and then sniggered. "Don't do anything I wouldn't do." She pulled away and closed my door. Her grinning face was the last thing I saw before I turned around. Was there anything that my mom wouldn't do?   
"Let's go," I said, and made a beeline for my door, when he stopped me.   
"No. We'll go out the same way I came in."   
"What? Have you gone totally, completely insane?"   
"Yes."   
"So I'm just supposed to jump down from my balcony?"   
"Sure, why not? I'll be down there first to catch you."   
"But-"   
"I won't let you fall."   
"I know that. But- Oh fine. Come on, let's go then."   
I watched anxiously as he gracefully fell to the ground in one leap. There was no other way describe his movements. It wasn't the feminine grace, but the dominating grace of a guy who knew just what he was doing. Being in karate for so long must have given that to him. The finesse was all his doing.   
"This feels like I'm sneaking out. Like something illicit," I shouted down to him as he raised his arms, preparing to catch me.   
He smirked. "It only adds a little more excitement."   
I smirked right back. "If you say so." I knew that I had nothing to fear, so I did as he asked. And just as he said he would, he caught and held me (bridal style!). He then put me down gently (but not before stealing a kiss). I could feel shivers running up and down my spine as he took a hold oh both my hands and led me away.   
To where, I didn't know. But I trust him.   
*~*~*~*~*   
  
  
Author's Note: Well, that's the end of it. I really didn't want to add more to it because that would defeat the whole purpose of the story being short, ne? ^_^ Oh, and another thing, that poem up there, I made it up, just to let you know. Weird, really, when I'm not even in drama... It just came when I was reading that one part in Kodocha where Akito and Sana both fell off a cliff... and have some quality time together... Teeheehee!   
Well, this is all for now. Ja ne!   
  
  
~Enchanted Pink Jade   
  
  
E-mail: Lyricalaznangel@aol.com 


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